The Foreign Service Journal, July-August 2003

he Buddha never met an ambas- sador’s wife, yet he comprehended that life is rooted in suffering. This is only one example of his perspi- cacity. Before narrating the unfortu- nate incident of the 150 Cats of Labor and the All-Night Full Moon Residence Rave, I feel obligated to informmy hon- ored reader about the circum- stances of my humble narrative. My name is Nita, and I am a cook at the residence of the U.S. ambassador. As such, I am situated far from the ambassador’s office, which means that the gossip and other news of importance are often intolerably late. Still, I am an important link in the chain of humble laborers of this embassy, and equally dedicated to the attempt to control our well- meaning if headstrong American masters and their families and pre- vent them from losing face. I am mindful of the many contri- butions of those fortunate and brave enough to have preceded me into the homes of the American diplo- mats. During my long apprentice- ship in the ambassador’s kitchen under my aunt, my ears were filled with chronicles, exploration and analysis of our Americans’ lamenta- ble ignorance of certain truths as revealed by the Buddha. Especially memorable was the assessment of the Honorable Tontai, beloved to all for his twin achievements as a plumber and a Buddhist social theologian. Tontai point- ed out that the concept of Right Speech, perhaps the most important of the Buddha’s Noble Eightfold Paths, with its emphasis on abstention from telling lies, harsh and abu- sive language, idle gossip, and backbiting, is essentially at odds with the job of a modern diplomat as practiced in our world. May I suggest that we do not give them sufficient credit for the difficulty of their situation? This is particularly the case with our Mrs. Ambassador. I feel she has her heart in the right place. I found her master’s thesis in art history (which I had an opportu- nity to examine in the cleaning process resulting from the decision to pack it for shipment in the same box as Mr. Ambassador’s beloved maple syrup) to show an active and inquisitive mind. However, experts in pre-Raphaelite line drawing are sadly underappreciated here, and it is therefore somewhat natural that she should get herself mixed up in an inauspicious, if well-intentioned, scheme with untoward conse- quences. His Excellency, the ambassador, by contrast, is apparently lacking in cultural refinement: he puts ketchup on his eggs and has an unfortunate aversion to our national cuisine when it is prepared with the appropriate amount of chili pep- pers. Yet, the gardeners, maids, security staff and I grow fond of him, as his unprepossessing pres- ence inexplicably keeps his family under control. So, it was with apprehension that we heard the J U LY- A U G U S T 2 0 0 3 / F O R E I G N S E R V I C E J O U R N A L 41 T M RS . A MBASSADOR GETS MIXED UP IN A WELL - INTENTIONED SCHEME WITH BIZARRE CONSEQUENCES . B Y D AVID M C A ULEY F O C U S N ITA AND THE F IRST N OBLE E IGHTFOLD P ATH Janet Cleland