The Foreign Service Journal, February 2009

F E B R U A R Y 2 0 0 9 / F O R E I G N S E R V I C E J O U R N A L 37 Quito), even though she had been raised as a business kid. She shared her dream for Global Nomads, an organization that would be for adults who had grown up in any interna- tionally mobile background. Norma borrowed against her own retirement account to make that conference happen in December 1988 … [It was] the first time adult TCKs gath- ered together to explore mutually our convergent journeys.” The Foreign Service community knows her best from her articles in the Foreign Service Journal , her seminars at the Foreign Service Institute, her presentations at the Foreign Service Youth Foundation’s welcome-home potlucks (includ- ing one just a month before her death) and the many work- shops she led. A Passionate Advocate Norma McCaig was passionate about all aspects of her life. She was active in her church, leading meditation classes and participating in the art club, and was an executive-level re- cruiter. But her greatest strength was her magnetic ability as a consummate communicator, a connector. Every fall, she would host a pumpkin-carving contest; and in the summer, she threw a huge party for her birthday. Whatever the occa- sion, the goal was always to get as many people as possible to- gether, to work on connections. A graduate of the Georgetown Training Specialist Pro- gram, she reached out to mentor other cross-cultural coaches and worked with anyone and everyone to further her vision of international understanding. This included working at the Washington International Center, organizing cross-cultural training for children at Berlitz and participating with NAFSA, the Association of International Educators, for more than 20 years. She carefully tailored her workshops for each audi- ence, even if the message was the same. For many years Ms. McCaig was affiliated with George Mason University. She actively helped adult Third Culture Kids become part of the discussion through Ruth Van Reken’s “Families in Global Transition” conferences. Appropriately, the 2008 conference honored Norma for her role in getting the movement off the ground in the early 1980s. The term “global nomad” was born in India. Ms. McCaig had traveled around the world to the South Indian hill sta- tion of Kodaikanal for her school reunion. As she was stand- ing in the shower, wondering why she was going to the reunion of a school she had attended for a few years where she may not know anyone, it occurred to her that as soon as she met the other alumni, she would feel at home because they were all “global nomads” like her. In what may have been a karmic aligning of her universe, she presented a paper in 2001 to the International Society for Krishna Consciousness on the children of devotees, who are often raised in cultures and countries different from those of their parents. Norma McCaig believed that children raised with a built- in multicultural understanding become culturally sensitive and globally-minded adults for whom any dream, even that of becoming president, is possible. Closure and Connection She authored numerous articles and publications on global nomads, “re-entry,” transitions, resiliency and her own “Seven Cs” — advice on raising global nomads. The fourth C is in- structive in this context: “ Closure and Connection. This is an area that is often overlooked. Unless parents have good closure skills, kids have very few chances to pick them up. It is vital to learn about clo- sure and walk your kids through healthy goodbyes. Remem- ber that global nomad children say more goodbyes before the age of 18 than many monoculturals do in a lifetime. “Even if you experience relatively low mobility abroad, chances are that people are always in transition around you and your children are saying many, many goodbyes in spite of their relative geographic stability. The grief associated with these goodbyes can accumulate unless intentional effort is made to grieve productively. It can be difficult and frighten- ing to watch a child grieve. This is especially true if you have not done your own grieving. “Communicate to your child that pain around goodbyes is an appropriate emotion that honors what the person (or lo- cation, or pet, etc.) has meant to you. Teach your children to incorporate things that they have valued about what or whom they have lost. For example, if your children deeply love an aspect of a culture that you are leaving, allow them to incor- porate it into your family culture. If your children miss an especially kind friend, teach them to incorporate that kind- ness into their own values.” While there was sadness at her memorial service, there is some comfort and a lesson to be learned fromNormaMcCaig’s life. As someone pointed out, she lived with cancer, enthusiatic and full of life to her final day. Taking her own advice on grief, I remember when, after a resilience workshop at FSI a year ago, I suggested we eat at one of my favorite hole-in-the-wall kabob restaurants, just so that I could watch with joy as Norma gleefully ordered dish after dish — mango lassi, naan, kebab, raita, dal and kheer. She would nibble and inhale the smells and flavors, reconnecting with her global childhood. I will drink mango lassis the length of my days, recalling Norma — filled with brightness, kindness and a zest for life. Ms. McCaig is survived by her brother and niece, who were there to take care of her at the end of her life. Memorial contributions may be made in Norma McCaig’s name to the Cancer Foundation (www.cancer.org/ ). Her legacy Web site can be viewed at http://www.legacy.com/ WashingtonPost/GB/GuestbookEntry.aspx?&PersonID= 120196511.