The Foreign Service Journal, March 2016

THE FOREIGN SERVICE JOURNAL | MARCH 2016 35 clear about what is and isn’t your responsibility, you may feel like you need to do everything, meet with everyone, read everything and know everything to do a good job. This is not the case. It leads inevitably to burnout. Define excellence and establish performance expectations with your supervisor, and then focus on achieving those expec- tations. Being clear about what your job is and how you should spend your time will help you weed out the less important from the most important because, of course, everything is important. In terms of per- formance, I posted my three work objectives and corresponding performance measures next to my computer. This served as a reminder of my priorities. In daily decisions about how to spend my time, whether to attend a meeting or review a document, I compared the relevance of the task to my work objectives. If the task didn’t get me closer to my objectives, I didn’t give it priority. The exception to this rule of thumb is when the task was a time-sensitive contribution to a high-priority institutional goal. In demarking these higher priority institutional goals, one is able to demonstrate the flexibility to respond to unforeseen or emergent challenges that executive leaders regularly confront. This simple method kept me focused on exceeding my work objectives. 3 . Reframe the “no.” If I listened to everyone who told me “no” in my career and my life, I probably wouldn’t have made it to the Senior Foreign Service, written and published a book, or started and led a business. People may tell you, “you aren’t ready” or “it’s not a good match” or “you lack (fill in the blank).” Everyone experiences these kinds of nos. It is easy to get discouraged, internalize the no and allow self-doubt to seep in. I’ve seen this self-doubt inhibit women more than men. You can choose to listen to people who tell you “no” or you can reframe it as one step closer to “yes.” You can view the no as a single person’s opinion. You can learn from it, adjust and move on. Whatever you do, don’t eliminate yourself from contention by not applying for the position you want. Figure out what you want to do, make a plan to do it and execute it by making tactical shifts as needed. 4 . Embrace vulnerability and master emotional control. First, vulnerability is not the same as “being emotional,” which connotes a lack of emotional control. Exhibiting controlled emotions can be an invaluable asset in demonstrating the kind of vulnerability all great leaders possess. Sociolo- gist Brene Brown explains: “We need to feel trust to be vulnerable, and we need to be vulnerable in order to trust.” You may associate being vulnerable with show- ing weakness; but, in fact, it is a strength that leads to greater trust. Women tend to possess this strength. Building trust requires a level of maturity and experience that often means putting others before yourself. Trust conveys “I care about you” and “I am here for you.” Trust is the founda- tion of everything an effective leader does, and it is an aspect of leadership that most women are particularly good at express- ing. So embrace your vulnerability, master emotional control and express it in the workplace. 5 . Open a “trust account” and make daily depos- its. Establishing trust is critical to creating an ideal workplace environment. It is absolutely essential to the devel- opment of your team and to obtaining your unit’s goals. Many struggle to earn, build and maintain trust with their staff, their supervisors or with interagency collaborators. Believe me, I’ve been there. It takes time to build trust because it happens in small, often intimate moments—the kind women are particu- larly attuned to. Here is the thing: your performance depends on your ability to gain the confidence and respect of all with whom you must collaborate as part of your job. It is the key to building a strong high-performing team and having a comfortable work environment. You are responsible for building trust and maintain- ing it. You can’t skip it. Everything else relies upon it—communi- cation, change, alignment, decisions and execution. If your foun- dation is shaky, then everything built on top of it is also unstable. 6 . Master the process of change. Bringing about change—which has five critical elements: new policies, new systems, new approaches, new procedures and reorganizations—will be a significant part of your job as a In daily decisions about how to spend my time, whether to attend a meeting or review a document, I compared the relevance of the task to my work objectives.