The Foreign Service Journal, June 2004

the Defense of Marriage Act.’” (See sidebar, p. 22.) Crane also notes that “GLIFAA and I sent off a joint letter. We know [the department is] putting together a task force to look at the definition of ‘Eligible Family Member,’ and we sent a letter say- ing that we applaud this.” Stepping outside the confines of the Foreign Service and diplomatic convention, it would appear that the rapid rate of change in the American family calls for a flexible response in defining the terms “household” and “family.” Historian Stephanie Coontz, the author of The Way We Really Are (Basic Books, 1997), tells the Journal , “Marriage has changed more in the last 30 years than in the previous 500. Marriage and the fam- ily is not the package deal it used to be.” For exam- ple, Coontz said, “There’s a 700-per- cent increase in people living in unmarried couples since 1970.” It appears that the State Department and the Foreign Service are moving in the direction of greater flexibility when it comes to defining family and allocating benefits for members of Foreign Service house- holds. And perhaps that flexibility will benefit the Service as well as the indi- viduals within it. As one Foreign Service specialist puts it, “Why should we make changes? The people who are willing to buck the system and to encourage corporate change are the same innovative, hard-working, policy- driven people that any organization would like to keep within its ranks. By encouraging change, the depart- ment will help itself keep creative minds.” M E M B E R S O F H O U S E H O L D J U N E 2 0 0 4 / F O R E I G N S E R V I C E J O U R N A L 27 The majority of A-100 students at FSI are quite welcoming to their gay and lesbian colleagues.