The Foreign Service Journal, July-August 2007

J U LY- A U G U S T 2 0 0 7 / F O R E I G N S E R V I C E J O U R N A L 59 cable, dismissing all of them. Then she opened the message. And there was the draft cable. Still, she knew he couldn’t possibly have all the details from the meeting. After all, he hadn’t taken a single note. As she read the report, her jaw dropped low- er and lower. All the details were there, all the numbers from the vice minister, all the dates, even the more eloquent foreign-language points from her own presentation. It wasn’t in the passive voice. There weren’t even any obscenities. That evening Ernie found Oggie working through the buffet at the Belgian National Day reception. “To arms, young Ernest!” Oggie exhorted him. “I favor robust engagement: skir- mish only briefly with the lighter appetizers before we take on the heavy meat and gravy items.” “I saw the cable on sauce subsi- dies,” Ernie said accusingly. Oggie heaped his plate with French fries and dolloped them with mayonnaise. “You wrote it. You just did the work. What about all you said about the principle … about doing whatever it takes to get out of doing the work?” Ernie contin- ued, tears welling in the corners of his eyes. “I believed in you!” Oggie piled gravy-covered beef on top of the fries, then scooped a chunk into his mouth. “I didn’t write any- thing,” he chewed. “The ministry guy who took notes at the meeting is a buddy of mine, and he was nice enough to share his report of the meeting.” “Translated into English?” Oggie swallowed the beef and pushed a baguette into his mouth. “Turns out he’s a big ‘Poseidon Adventure’ fan, too. I lent him my copy. Special edition, very rare.” Clarissa walked up with a glass of champagne and a satisfied smile. “The ambassador was very pleased with the results of the sauce démarche. It seems we have opened a new era of sauce-based cooperation — perhaps even a model for an enhanced bilateral relationship.” Oggie nodded and chewed. A glob of brown gravy dropped from his chin onto his brown coat sleeve. Clarissa took a deep breath. “Ogden, the ambassador also said the cable on the démarche was …” she choked slightly and downed the cham- pagne. “It was well-written.” She flushed, her eyes darting from side to side. “Oh, there’s Ambassador Leo- tard. I have to engage him on an urgent biofuel issue. Excuse me.” She darted past Oggie and Ernie into the crowd. Ernie stared after her in wonder. “She didn’t even tell us to mingle.” Oggie swallowed another chunk of beef and popped a handful of mayon- naise-soaked fries into his mouth. “Come on, Ernie. This buffet’s not going to eat itself.”

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