The Foreign Service Journal, April 2021

48 APRIL 2021 | THE FOREIGN SERVICE JOURNAL Read aloud to one another. Be in the present. This is a good time for family bonding. You’ll never get another like it.” ECS’ Moreth agrees. “The State Department has so many talented, independent and resilient people, but ‘doing it all’ is not sustainable,” she says. Modify expectations: “Are the clothes and dishes everywhere going to matter in five days, five weeks, five months?” She also recommends joining one of the virtual sup- port groups offered by ECS, the Family Liaison Office and others. When asked to give other parents advice, another FSO says merely: “I guess look at my last six months and do the oppo- site…?” (Helpful advice? Perhaps not. But I think we can all agree we need this woman at our post with us.) Sociologist Jesse Calarco of the University of Indiana says we shouldn’t be asking other moms for “tips and tricks” to sur- viving this work-life crunch. “The people I’d much rather target for recommendations are the people with the power to ensure that mothers get the resources and support they need,” she says. “Because moms don’t need advice right now. They need politicians and business owners and community leaders and their own partners to step up and give them the support they deserve.” After the Pandemic The big question on all of these parents’ minds: What’s next? Many hope that after the pandemic is over, those of us in the for- eign affairs community can continue to take advantage of flexible telework opportunities. “In Washington, D.C., there is a growing cultural acceptance around telework flexibility. I hope that the State Department will maintain flexible situational or scheduled telework options for overseas employees in the future,” says one FSO. Jason Singer says that AFSA and USAID are looking at les- sons learned during the pandemic, including those related to workplace flexibilities and telework. But, he notes, “while we’ve learned to do many things on a virtual basis, the heart of our development work will remain about people, and no amount of Zoom calls can replace our personal, field-based engagement.” Family member Jessica says she has been working remotely for years, so “it feels a little bit like the rest of the world is catch- ing up to the way I’ve been working.” While she prefers telework- ing, she misses the travel that was a central part of her job prior to the pandemic. “There is nothing like white hotel sheets, room service and alone time.” Travel and alone time: two things that Foreign Service parents are undoubtedly missing these days. n